The concept of long-distance relationships (LDRs) is one that is often contentious. Many state the claim that LDRs are a prolonged disappointment, ending in a situation that proves distance can block the connection between two partners. The other side of the argument lies in individuals who believe LDRs are worth it and doable if you correctly prioritize your relationship.
Unquestionably, LDRs appear and operate differently in the age of digital evolution that we are in. With various technological ways to connect with your partner, like FaceTime, texting, social media sites, and voice messaging, it is easy for healthy communication to present itself despite the locations of the couple.
Andy Merolla’s model of relationship management further investigates the success of LDRs through clear communication and remote quality time. Merolla’s model identifies three trends seen in long-distance partners: dyadic communication (virtual partner communication/quality time), intrapersonal thinking (imagining scenarios with your long-distance partner), and network interaction (talking to loved ones about one’s partner). Falling into the dyadic category, remote communication is an undeniably strong force in maintaining an LDR.
Additionally, a study conducted by the National Library of Medicine found that couples that fall into the long-distance category tend to engage in remote communication more than couples who are located close to each other. Long-distance couples put effort into this type of communication to account for the lack of physical, in-person meetings. Reported behaviors can be seen in frequent and longer video calls and nearly constant and daily text messages. Moreover, couples in LDRs may inform their partners of events of their days or send a daily “Good morning” text message to ensure that communication and connection are being prioritized and practiced.
Conversely, a long-distance relationship sometimes does not sustain the connection that once was. According to the American Journal of Social Sciences and Humanities Research, the main reasons why LDRs end are because of expenses paid to visit partners, a lack of physical intimacy, and proximity in the relationship (Mietzner and Lin). Couples are faced with a sudden lack of face-to-face communication, which leads to feelings of love and belonging being lost.
Additionally, couples can begin to feel bored and dissatisfied with remote communication, no longer cherishing communication with one’s partner. Technology also gets in the way of how communication between one’s partner is perceived. A text can be interpreted as sounding jealous, dissatisfied, or passive-aggressive. All of these aspects can lead to feelings of loneliness, irritation, and hopelessness, leading to the end of the partnership.
Despite the disadvantages, long-distance relationships are invaluable once a couple learns to navigate challenges and stabilize their connection.
Trenton Fulgham, a second-year mechanical engineering student remarks, “It’s definitely worth it if you’re willing to put the work in; both sides have to try to make it work.”
Fulgham also commented on how to work through the difficulty of the proximity of long-distance relationships. Though it is challenging to be away from one’s partner for an extended amount of time, it makes it that much more special when partners reconnect in person. Fulgham concluded his sentiments with the statement, “Just a hug and a kiss, and it just makes it feel like it’s worth all the struggle.”