Are you in a situationship?


You’ve met this person. For the past few months you two have gone on dates and even slept together.

But like TLC you both may or may not be creeping on the side. You know what one another likes and dislikes, and even hang out with each other’s circle of friends – maybe even their family. You each show up in each other’s call logs every day.

Over time emotions have developed, but quite frankly they are not a daily hot topic. To make things more ambiguous, when the question is asked: ‘Is he or she your boyfriend or girlfriend,’ the answer is no. Things become more complicated when you start to notice them still entertaining direct messages on Instagram and Twitter.

Here is the kicker: You cannot say anything about it; you both are still single, right?

If yes, this is the most transparent way to label your partnership; a situationship. No title, strings and intimacy are not up for discussion. You find yourself to be in a gray area of the relationship spectrum.

“You hook up from time to time and do everything a normal couple would do. Only difference is you aren’t exclusive or even monogamous,” said Shavontae Smith, a senior business major at Florida A&M.

Although having all of the inter-workings of a monogamous relationship, many young adults have found this kind of relationship to be much more suitable for them.

This new dynamic of a relationship has become so frequent with the newest generation that it has earned the nickname “millennial love.”

John Warford, a history professor at FAMU, said he has recently come across many young adults in this predicament.

“I’ve noticed this in both young men and women, and that’s not anything but a game. Therefore, what I try to get them to understand is before getting involved with anyone in any fashion, know what you want and stand by those decisions. If that other person does not match up, then it’s not worth your time.”

Halia Brayon, 22-year-old student at Bethune-Cookman University, said she has learned the hard way  from being in a “millenial love” relationship. “Take it from me, I have learned my lesson from experiencing one; it does not last. The lines of communions are extremely vague and too much so open to interpretation. There’s no clarity as to what’s going on.”

Some have described millennials as having commitment-phobia. But it has become more of an issue due to the cultural trends that are set in place. Dishonesty has become prevalent in the age of technology while very little is done face to face anymore.

Jay Masi, a student at Hampton University, said that while she has not been one to partake in a situationship, she has watched many of her friends and family members be involved in one.

“Seems like everyone is too afraid to just be direct about what they want. So, they’d rather say nothing and continue to run in circles than to address it. If anything, they want to have their cake and eat it too.”

Millenials, it seems, don’t want to get too involved. They want fun, of course, but they will get only so close most of the time.