He posts me, he posts me not

Photo Caption: The debate of posting or not posting your partner can have extreme effects on love.
Photo Courtesy: Pinterest

With the age of technology growing, there seems to be relationship rules and regulations for Instagram and other social media platforms. Issues arise from relationships, usually going back to social media usage. These problems typically stem from liking inappropriate pictures of the opposite sex, not posting your partner as frequently as they would like and the slew of DMs from people worldwide.

The concept of privacy is one of the reasons why couples do not publish photos of each other on social media. Often, your significant other is not interested in being posted regularly, just to be recognized occasionally. But how can one remain private when everything is published on social media?

Damari Massey, a fourth-year bio pre-med major, believes that posting on social media is unnecessary if the relationship is healthy.

“Being in a relationship and posting your partner on social media is not important,” Massey said. “If they have a good relationship in person, then everything else is additional. Privacy is peace in today’s world.”

According to Wandi Jama, a journalist at News24.com, a study published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, demonstrates that refusing to upload images of your relationship indicates that you usually disconnect and retreat from them.

“An active unwillingness to post pictures of your partner may be a sign that you have an avoidant attachment style,” Jama said. “Meaning that you typically withdraw and disengage from your partner regularly, as opposed to giving them the attention they might want.”

This may appear to some as a contradictory statement. Privacy in a relationship does not always imply that your partner is attempting to keep you hidden from the rest of the world. You should not seek affirmation from your partner through social network posts. It’s better to focus on your real-life connection than on how it seems online.

These days, every relationship goes through a “double-tapping inappropriate photographs” period. Some couples feel the urge to like indecent photographs of the other sex which usually leaves the other person in the relationship with uneasiness and self-doubt.

Donte Bush, a fourth-year business administration major, understands the ramifications of liking an inappropriate photo of someone who is not his girlfriend. Still, he feels there is no problem because of how social media functions.

“I feel like liking pictures is okay because it’s social media,” Bush said. “Unless it’s a person you have messed with before, I feel like it’s okay to like the pictures. However, if my girlfriend said she didn’t like it, by all means, I would stop. Only if she lives by the same standard.”

Accepting and entertaining DMs might lead to a relationship’s demise. There is an art to dealing with an improper DM from someone who is not a part of your relationship. The best course of action is to simply ignore it. Therefore, giving your spouse no reason to be upset if you do not amuse the person on the other end of the phone.

Every connection is unique. Some relationships are designed to be public, while others are designed to be private. People must learn not to allow what others do on social media to determine how they flourish in their relationships. In light of Valentine’s Day, all anybody wants is to be truly happy.