The phrase “you gotta be two something to do something” is taking social media by storm as many people have recently shown an outpouring of support for plus-size women. Being Plus-sized is so much more than what the media portrays a thick woman to be.
Well-known celebrities such as K Michelle, Kim Kardashian and Kylie Jenner have paid for body enhancements that everyday women have been blessed with naturally — whether it’s inherited genetically or due to unhealthy eating habits.
As a member of the plus-size community, it is important to address what the phrase “you gotta be two something to do something” actually means and how other women feel about it. Is it support or fetishizing over plus-size bodies?
Deiana Abdel-Gadir is a FAMU student and plus-size woman who was eager to give her take on the topic.
“I only feel like it’s fetishized when compliments are given in a certain way. It’s the delivery of how the compliment is given. If it’s focused on how I look and not me as a whole, then it’s kinda annoying to not know if the compliment is genuine or not. Dating while plus-size is just filtering through a lot of BS,” Abdel-Gadir said.
In today’s climate social media has a huge impact on how information is shared. TikTok and Twitter are the frontrunners of most trends that sweep the nation time after time. And plus-size women weren’t at the center of media and fashion until it became a trend.
Many stereotypes negatively labeled plus-size women in ways you could not imagine. But the most important being that big women were viewed as subservient and insecure, and this idea in itself was a reason why many men seek out plus-size women.
Niya Lawson, a part-time bartender, esthetician and makeup artist, says she is frustrated with people believing in the stereotypes of plus-size women.
“They think big girls are supposed to be insecure and they can get anything from us. I’ve been offended on so many levels because they think I’m supposed to be insecure. They think that you’re going to be submissive like you can’t get no other man,” Lawson said.
Dating as a plus-size woman does not have to be difficult, but with this newfound attention put on us the debate of thick women vs. skinny women is just as harmful as the light skin vs, dark skin debate. And while everyone is entitled to an opinion and preference in who they choose to date, some find it to be a red flag if a person has a specific type.
Lashonda Woods, a health-care worker and plus-size connoisseur, believes having a type is a red flag.
“That’s just a small group of people’s state of mind that you have to be two something to do something, so I don’t like their mindset. I don’t like that they only want plus-size women. To me you can’t help who you are attracted to but don’t say you gotta be two something to do something because you can find your soul-mate in someone that is 150 pounds. Although that’s your mindset, stop putting people in categories,” Woods said.
There are so many names out there to describe a plus-size woman. From Big Girl, BBW (Big Beautiful Woman) and my personal favorite, Big Body Benz. Whether you choose to adopt any of these unnecessary titles, always remember that confidence is a god-given right. It is up to you whether you choose to use yours or not.