Dating during a pandemic

Columnist Kylii Clay. Photo courtesy Clay

What is the state of love today? It could mean anything from a $100,000 purse to personal time at Target. The future of love is personalized and with the addition of technology, love and love-making are at the tip of your fingers.

We all know the current condition of the state. It that shall not be named has affected everyone and every aspect of public life we knew. But life must carry on, within its current limits of course. The constant quarantine becomes mundane and hopeless without a distraction to lift spirits.

For those who do choose to stay home and socially distance, finding a special someone can make life so much more engaging. Besides, Netflix, Hulu and Disney+ are starting to run their course, so it might be time to pick up another hobby.

 

Who’s looking for love?

Dating was once a complicated and personal process. Even with technology, dating is still complicated. However, the technology makes dating easier to approach.

Ten years ago, dating more often began by word of mouth: speed dating, blind dates, dates with friends, friends setting other friends up. When dating was not so reliant on technology, there was a personal aspect.

Now that online dating has become more prominent, the approach to dating is now cold and impersonal. The vast amount of options can devalue the emotional component of dating.

Users are fully aware of the gamble, but with high risk comes high reward.

 

In this alternate universe where social gatherings are not recommended, dating apps are a temporary cure for loneliness. They can provide users with anything from dates to friends. Variety is the name of the game.

With apps like Tinder, Bumble and Hinge, dating these days is more explicit, while at the same time confusing as hell.

It all depends on what the user is looking for. Strictly sexual? Put it in your bio. Set on a relationship? Put it in the bio. Looking for friends? That’s right. Put it in your bio.

Your biography, along with your photos, allow you five seconds to give swipers a taste of who you are.

 

Is it that serious?

Although dating apps allow you to dip your toe into the dating pool, meeting is a coin toss. Many users swipe through their dating apps just to pass the time. I know I have. According to businessofapps.com, as of October 2020 70 percent of college students have never met up with their matches. Users G.H. and V.J. can attest to this statistic. G.H., a straight female, says that she does not take dating apps seriously.

“I use Tinder to find dudes I might be interested in or just to look at cute guys. But a lot of guys are just there for playful relationships, nothing serious.” However, she does not discourage others from using the app. “Just because it doesn’t work for me, doesn’t mean it won’t work for them.”

With so many options at their fingertips, many college students do not take their matches seriously enough to meet in person. People become disposable pictures to judge and discard.

V.J., a straight male, has not had much luck on dating apps either. “I’ve never been successful using it. Like even seeing them at all. I’m more of an interactive person anyway.” People like V.J. who seek an interactive dating experience are suffering a great loss. Due to the pandemic, students are not able to go out and meet new people without the risk of contracting COVID-19.

Maybe now is just not the time to have love on the brain.

It seems that the general consensus for the college student demographic is clear: There is less of a chance that a user will actually meet a match. College students are more likely to use the app out of boredom than to find a relationship.

Student interaction with apps like Tinder reveal a truth: Generation Z is not focused on relationships. Considering the major shift in gender roles and a hyperfocus on education and career, maybe a relationship with self is the best way to go. After all, self love is the best love.