College age men mature slowly

Young brothers these days might legally be adults, but mentally, they can not release the teet.From the hardworking blue-collar woman, to the independent and career-oriented, if there is one thing women have in common, it is their baffl ement with black men just not having their lives in order.Tamarah Hatcher of West Palm Beach is not salty about college-aged gents not committing, but she is not optimistic either.“I don’t want to say ‘hell no, a guy won’t commit,’ but no, they won’t,” said Hatcher.According to societal standards, guys of Generation Yor the “hip-hop generation,” ages 18-25, are considered lazy, poor and promiscuous-lacking real ambition.Even those in college are harshly criticized. Adrian Young, a 22-year-old healthcareadministration student at Tallahassee Community College says he is mature because he“handles his business” and pays for everything he has. But maturity is a lot more than paying for a couple meals here and there.Dougla-Khan Stancil, coordinator of clinical programs at FAMU’s counseling center at Sunshine Manor, said there’s no longer a relevant defi nition of the word inrelation to black men.“I think more and more over time, as far as maturity is concerned, it’s being held back. They [young black men] don’t have the examples around them of what male maturity really is,” Stancil said.In a sense, black men are slowly but surely having their testosterone replaced with estrogen-but not by choice.The lack of father fi gures within the household has forced black women to raise their sons on their own- without any male guidance.“We focus on academic and intellectual education but a lot of times, we don’t focus on personal development education…people aren’t learning what’s appropriate and inappropriate and what’s a healthy relationship,” he says.When it comes to relationships, Young said he was not ready for such a big step-right now he just wants to have fun.Sisters on campus feel that is the problem though. Abigail Chin, 20, a second-year computer-engineering student from Fort Lauderdale said males are “still on a little kidlevel.”“They’re so infl uenced by the parties and the girls. They don’t realize that’s not what it’s all about,” said Chin.William Anderson, 22, a fourth-year mathematics pre-med student at Fisk University, does not even see a relationship as a priority at this juncture in his life.“I don’t think commitment [to a woman] is important to me right now. Currently, I’m focusing on securing my future and putting away childish behavior,” said Anderson of Montego Bay, Jamaica.Stancil hosts a bi-weekly summit in Gibbs Hall called, Man Talk, exclusively for young men on campus.He aims to educate and inspire the guys on reaching their full potential and becoming outstanding citizens.Each session, Stancil asks a seasoned black male to attend Man Talk to be an example of how young brothers should conduct themselves in society-however, Stancil is not sure who the next speaker will be at this time.“Guys want that ‘hit it and go’ and many women have higher standards than that,”said 21-year-old Hatcher.“I haven’t dated anyone from FAMU, but just by watching their immaturity level, it is not where I would expect a male to be.”