It happens to the best of us.
We meet someone, think he is one way, then lo and behold, after a couple of months and feelings get involved he turns out to be the total opposite. And by that time, we have learned to like the person we initially met, not the person he or she has become.
It’s called: The okey-doke.
Why do people think putting on a front for a relationship is the way to go?
A friend of mine met this girl. He thought she was the best thing since sliced bread, a perfect 10. He even was about to leave the game for her.
After finally getting enough courage to ask her out, he thought everything was all good. He had his feelings on the table and was happy about it, saying things like, “She would never do anything to hurt me; she is just like that.” But little did he know, she was about to show her other side. That side that was secretly talking to her ex and would eventually get caught by my friend with physical evidence.
Yes, this is an extreme version of “the okie-doke,” but just think about it, we have all met someone who we thought was one way, but turned out to be the one thing we were trying to avoid.
Don’t you remember that guy or girl who had all their stuff together when you first met. He or she was doing well in class, had a wonderful personality, a job and a car. But once you actually started to get to know them, all the while sacrificing your time and effort, you woke up one day and realized they had turned into their evil twin.
Now, they are failing all their classes, always have an attitude, have no motivation and have so smoothly changed their look from that well put-together person to someone who believes that organization is a thing of the past.
People, it is OK to reveal your true self when meeting someone. Let them know exactly what they are getting themselves into before feelings are involved.
According to http://peoplerelationships.syl.com, communication and honesty are at the top of the list of most important aspects in a relationship. Once a partner feels that he or she has been led astray, the relationship could be on the brink of disaster. The only reason a relationship continues once an individual feels lied to is because he or she is still in love with their mate’s personality and mannerisms they initially met, not the person with whom they are currently.
I think everyone should come with a brochure that highlights all of his or her good and bad qualities. Being hooked up to a lie detector test would help too. This way, when an essential question is asked, you will not be a victim of the okie-doke.
Just remember, the truth shall set you free.
Katrelle Simmons is a junior English education student from Orlando. She can be reached at simmons_katrelle@yahoo.com.