As if there aren’t enough problems facing our generation, we’re plagued by another issue that often occurs but goes overlooked: domestic violence.
Like other issues, it’s just swept under the rug, and black folks just pretend that it doesn’t happen. When it’s brought up, you hear many women say things like, “If that were me…” and “Girl, I wish he would put his hands on me, I’d do this or I’d do that!”
Realistically, most of these women don’t “do this” or “do that” because they’re ashamed of what others may say. I know because I was that woman that didn’t do this, that or anything else because I was “in love” and ashamed.
The relationship almost never starts off abusive, but makes the outside world believe that this couple is nothing short of the next Will and Jada, including mine.
I was always told how lucky I was to have him and how cute we were together. It started with play fighting, but every now and then, it would get too aggressive, he would hit a little too hard.
Suddenly, everything he did became my fault: my choosing to come to Florida A&M University instead of a Texas school was seen to be an act of me leaving him. Displacement, another attribute of domestic violence, is next.
One afternoon during a conversation he became agitated. His agitation grew into violence. When I decided to exit the premises he decided to stop me from leaving by placing a gun to my head.
All kinds of things raced through my head as he told me that he didn’t care if I lived or died and that he would kill me. He uttered profanity, laughed, and he yelled.
Seemingly, he enjoyed the intimidation he placed upon me.
After he saw I was clearly terrified, he opened my car door and drug me to his front yard in an attempt to make me stay. As he began to kick me, I prayed to God for strength. I began to fight back and free myself of this horrendous ordeal. I ran to my car, drove home and called the police.
Immediately I filed an assault charge against him. The police did not arrest him because I was on his property. Today, the case is still pending after six months.
So what’s my purpose behind this writing? Not for sympathy, but for strength. To anyone who may be engulfed in a relationship that has a glimmer of violence; whether emotional, verbal, or physical you have the strength to stand and leave. Obstacles and adversities only make us stronger.
This was truly a learning experience for me. God has a reason for everything and mine is to help others who may feel alone in this situation.
There is a way out.
Special to The Famuan. Jazmin Brooks is a sophomore business administration student from Fort Worth, Texas. Contact her at missbrooks1887@yahoo.com.